Not yet of middle age,
they lie and joke to each other
oh, we're getting older now
- ya hafta expect a little slowin' and a little stiffenin' of ya joints
all the while ignoring
the desperate fear and panic
- only partly hidden by joke and smile and "laugh lines"
as they come to realise
the true pain and cost of corporate world
- of wanting the big, glitzy house
paid for by so many hours away
it is never seen by sun
- of seeking pay rises to pay for
performative family treats
- fast paced holidays away, to be enjoyed no matter what
- of seeing and coping with and doing
abuse and bullying and exchanges of
well, if you want, ya gotta do and give and pay
- even if you don't
- of locking in and hiding pain and misery and self loathing
from those one loves
especially when their wishes make it worse
- and, maybe worst of all, the self loathing of
knowingly lying to and deceiving
those who will come next
and watching their growing horror and hate
as they find and see the truth,
and loathe with such a contempt
it chills what little heart you had left.
Copyright © Kayleen White, Wiradjuri and Widjabul-Wiabol woman of the Lost Generations, 2025 (where this date is different to the year of publication, it is because I did the post some time ago and then used the scheduling feature to delay publication). I take these photographs and undertake these writings – and the sharing of them – for the sake of my self expression. I am under no particular illusions as to their literary or artistic merit, and ask only that any readers do not have any undue expectations. If you consider me wrong, then publish me – with full credit and due financial recompense, of course :)
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